The Avatar's Son
by gnbrules
Summary: Throughout his childhood and adult life, Bumi has had to accept that being the Avatar's first son didn't make him the son his father wanted. Unambiguously and unapologetically angst-ridden.


**The Avatar's Son**

**Summary: Throughout his childhood and adult life, Bumi has had to accept that being the Avatar's first son didn't make him the son his father wanted. Unambiguously and unapologetically angst-ridden.**

**Dedication: This was written for my best friend, partner-in-writing and partner-in-crime (or against crime), Katie. I present, for your birthday, a sad Bumi fic filled with sad Bumi moments.**

He's forty years old and still occasionally feels like a child, even with all his accomplishments. He graduated from the United Forces Academy at age 24, rose up to lieutenant in six years, made lieutenant commander five years after that. Now he's set to speak at the graduation of the UFA's newest recruits, where he'll also formally accept his promotion to commander and the insignia pin that befits his new rank.

He tells his parents and family well in advance of the event, and they're all set to be there. Kya and Tenzin have made the travel arrangements for everyone, and Mom and Dad say they can't wait. They've all promised they would be there, and it may be childish for a man as old as him, but he can't wait to see his father beaming at him from the crowd. It's a look he hasn't seen in years, it feels like, though he tries to tell himself that's just his imagination. He knows his father loves him, he knows his father's proud of him. It'll just be nice to see it, is all.

A few days before the ceremony, his mother sends Kya to give him a message that all but stops Bumi's heart in his chest. "Dad's sick, Bum. He...I don't think he's going to make it to the ceremony. I..."

Kya begins to falter, begins to cry, and that's how he knows how bad it is. Kya never cries.

"He promised he'd be there," Bumi says, but his throat is clogged and he's not even thinking about the ceremony at all. Kya takes his hand and that night they set off for home.

Avatar Aang doesn't make it to the ceremony, nor does the rest of the family, nor does Bumi himself. Instead, they sit around Aang's bed and say goodbye as the old Avatar closes his eyes for one last time. Bumi knows that he'll never see that proud beam from his father again.

* * *

He's twenty-one and it's no coincidence that the day he officially decides to sign up for the United Forces is the same day that Tenzin gets his airbending master tattoos. He's proud of his little brother, he really is, but the young teen casts a long shadow that Bumi has no desire to stay in any longer.

Tenzin's tattooing goes well and the following celebration lasts a couple hours. There is food and drink, traditional meals of the Air Nomads and the Air Nomad colors around them and the entire living population of airbenders in one room. Luckily, being a humble and spiritual people, the festivities are quiet and respectful, everything in moderation.

Once everything is done and they've all made it back home, he asks his family into the living room so that he can make the announcement. He wants to be proud and confident in his speech, but it comes out as near a mumble as possible. "Tomorrow I'm going to sign up for the United Forces." he says.

His mother, sister, and brother all have their own types of smiles. His mother's, soft and knowing. His sister's, a proud and conspiratorial grin. His brother's, meek but sincere.

But it is his father he looks to, and always has been.

His father's look is somehow worse than disappointment. It's surprise.

"Bumi, this is so sudden. Don't you think we should talk about it first?"

The rest of the family glances awkwardly around, uncomfortable. Bumi doesn't have it in him to say what he should say, but Kya does. Her voice is angry, sharp. She's always been his greatest defender, knowing exactly how it feels to be set aside by their father. "Dad, it's all he's talked about for months. I was _there _when he asked your opinion on joining. You said you thought it was a good idea, and you'd talk about it again after you and Tenzin were done training."

Aang blinks, trying to remember. "I thought it was more hypothetical. Oh, Bum, I'm sorry. You know how preoccupied I've been, finishing up your brother's training so he could become a master this year."

It's the exact wrong thing to say, and everyone but his dad seems to know it. Not even Kya, however, has the heart to point it out.

* * *

He's thirteen and the family's on holiday at the Eastern Air Temple; for once, they've all been brought along instead of just Tenzin. Bumi had volunteered to go with his Dad to the marketplace, his primary reason being to escape the sight of his brother being smothered with affection by the air acolytes of all ages. The little girls all follow him around, and what bothers Bumi the most is that Tenzin doesn't even like girls yet. He spends most of his time trying to evade them, Kya having convinced him they all have incurable cooties. Even with Tenzin doing his best to shun them, all Bumi's attempts at impressing them with his boomerang skills have been in vain.

All in all, an errand with Dad seems like the better choice.

At the market, Bumi and his dad meet a fruit vendor who clearly knows Aang from previous trips. "Ah, the Avatar come again! And who is this fine young lad with you?" he asks, looking at Bumi curiously.

"Hi, Ketu, it's nice to see you again. This is my son."

Ketu the fruit vendor squints at him. "But it can't be! Has it really been so long since you've visited? Young Tenzin seems to have grown and aged thrice as fast as normal boy! Wasn't it only yesterday he was just learning to walk and talk?!"

"No, no, this isn't Tenzin, Ketu." says Aang with a small chuckle. "This is my other son, Bumi."

_The other son. _

Since Tenzin showed his bending ability, it's all Bumi's ever been. Still, Bumi manages a polite smile at the vendor. "Hi," he says shyly.

"Ah, I beg your pardon, Avatar Aang. I had no idea you had _another _son."

Bumi feels the forced smile slip from his face. Had his Dad not mentioned him at all? Did his name never come up when he talked to people, when people asked after the Avatar's family?

As they stop at more food carts where vendors have similar reactions of not knowing him from a hole in the ground, Bumi has a disheartening revelation.

Being the Avatar's _other son_ was a lot like not being his son at all.

* * *

He's twelve and Tenzin has so much to learn. Learn to meditate. Learn the names of famous airbenders and monks. Learn to enter the spirit world. To know the foods of the Air Nomads. The customs. The holidays. There is no end to what Tenzin must learn, and no end to what his father must teach him. As you can imagine, it leaves little time for anything or anyone else.

It was his mother that taught Bumi most of his primary school lessons – how to read, write, do math. How to speak correctly, ask intelligent questions, occasionally sit still. He never had to worry about the Air Nomads, any more than any other non-airbending kid. His father never drilled him with trivia like he did Tenzin, even though Bumi could have answered most of it if he'd ever been asked. A few times, he'd tried to show his father that he'd learn all these things too, while on the sidelines. It never seemed to draw his attention away from Tenzin. Though it was all well and fine for Bumi to know, he didn't _need to know. _The air nation lifestyle didn't depend on him, it depended on his brother.

So instead Bumi learns what he wants to learn from Uncle Sokka. Whenever they visit his uncle, he always has time for his nephew. Though he's never said it, Bumi has always suspected that he's Uncle's Sokka's favorite. They are a lot alike, really. Uncle Sokka brought him his first boomerang and taught him how to use it. He taught him how to spear and cook fish. Make snowmen. Hunt. Apply war paint to his face. Sail. Bumi probably loves that the most. Being on a ship or a raft or small boat makes him feel powerul. Neither of them could waterbend, but they could use the water to do their bidding and to take them far off places. Kya had only a passing interest in boats, Tenzin had none, so it was often just uncle and nephew alone on the sea.

Captain and first mate.

One night, after Uncle Sokka drops him off at home, he goes to bed reflecting on the great day he's had. Bumi can't help but wonder what it would be like to be Uncle Sokka's son. Being a bender wouldn't be expected, so not being a bender wouldn't be a disappointment to anyone. He could make him proud in all the ways that matter, by being good at the things Uncle Sokka values – creativity, good ideas, hunting, fishing, sailing, telling good jokes.

_I wish I was his – _but Bumi can't bring himself to finish the thought. It makes him feel too guilty, and he just wishes, as he has many times before, that he were just the son his actual father wanted instead.

* * *

He's ten and when no one is looking, he still tries to airbend even though everyone else has accepted that he just isn't any kind of bender at all. Still, he practices the motions he's seen his father make. He tries the air scooter only to fall flat on his butt. At night he lies awake and tries to send gusts of wind to close his bedroom door. Not so much as a breeze ever gets summoned from his motions, no matter how much he wills it.

Then one day, he's chasing a three-year-old Tenzin around the house in play. His little brother may be annoying sometimes but Bumi actually really likes making him smile and giggle. The two are laughing and bumping into furniture when suddenly their father jumps out into the room, ready to capture and embrace them both. Then it happens: little toddler Tenzin begins to lose his balance and the ground rushes to meet him. He throws his hands forward in a reflex but they never touch the floor. Instead, the gust of wind shooting from his hands blows him straight back upright.

For one moment, Bumi understands before his father does. _Oh no, _he thinks as his heart sinks in his chest.

"Tenzin - you can bend! My son can bend!" Aang yells out to no one in particular, and then the hug that had surely been meant for both his sons just a moment ago is now for Tenzin alone. His father is beaming with pride and joy at the little boy, and Bumi stands to the side forgotten, wondering sadly if his dad will ever look at him like that again.


End file.
